An elderly couple were sitting on the back pourch enjoying a cup of tea.
Wife: Oh! Honey, last night I had the most amazing dream.
Husband: Yes, dear. And what was it about.
Wife: I came down the stairs into the living room. And there was this beautiful Christmas tree. And all over the tree from top to bottom, it was covered with penises. And at the top was a large beautiful penis...
The husband interrupts: That was mine wasn't it dear?
Wife: Oh no. It was Tom Sellecks!
The husband stews over this for a few moments. Then begins to tell his wife about the dream he had last night.
Husband: It was similar to yours dear. Except that the Christmas tree was covered from top to bottom with pussies; and at the top was the smallest, tightest most beautiful pussy you ever saw...
The wife interrupts: That was mine wasn't it honey.
Husband: No, yours was the one holding up the tree.
Assorted | One Liners| Mostly True Stories| Signs of our Times