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There are 3 stages of sex after marriage. The first stage is the "Anywhere" stage, when you'll do it anywhere - the kitchen table, the shower, on top of the washing machine during the spin cycle. The second stage is the "Bedroom" stage, when you'll only do it in the bedroom with the lights turned out. The third stage is the "Hallway" stage, when you pass each other in the hallway and say "Screw you!"
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