The Fund Raising Problems of Father Murphy
Father Murphy was a priest in a very poor parish. He asked for suggestions as to how he could raise money for his church. He was told that horse owners always had money so ho went to a horse auction, but he made a very poor buy, as the horse turned out to be a donkey. However, he thought that he might as well enter the donkey in a race.The donkey came in third, and the next day the headlines in the paper read, "Father Murphy's Ass Shows." The archbishop saw the paper and was very displeased. The next day, the donkey came in first and the headlines read "Father Murphy's Ass out front." The Archbishop was up in arms and figured that something had to be done.
Father Murphy entered the donkey for the third time and this time this time it came in second. Now the headlines read "Father Murphy's Ass back in place." The Archbishop thought this too much so he forbad the priest to enter the donkey the next day, which inspired the editor to write "Archbishop Scratches Father Murphy's Ass." Finally, the Archbishop heard this and ordered Father Murphy to get rid of the donkey. So he gave it to Sister Agatha for a pet. Now the headlines read "Nun Owns Best Ass in Town." When the archbishop heard this, he ordered her to dispose of the animal at once, so she sold it for ten dollars. The next day the headlines read "Sister Agatha Peddles Her Ass for Ten Dollars."
They buried the Archbishop.
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